Jobs

Civilian

Icon	Job Title	Difficulty	Info	Access
	Staff Assistant	Easy	Produce mass quantities of bath salts in maint, be a nuisance, and ruin everything. Save the station when the nukies arrive. Scavenge the station for weapons and gear, weed, and pills. Be the first one to die.	Maintenance, Technical Storage
	Chef	Easy	Accidentally get tomato-flooded by Botany. Deep-fry everything. Make non-Euclidean sandwiches. Place pies inside pies that contain pies.	Kitchen
	Chaplain	Easy	Steal corpses for funerals. Fart on your bible. Never be around when you are actually needed. Hand out bibles to monkeys. Become the Buddhist-Jewish-Christian-Muslim-Hindu-Atheist-Satanist prophet the station needs.	Chapel, Morgue
	Bartender	Easy	Get drunk. Lose your liver and your shotgun in your drunken stupor. Become a victim of Russian Roulette two minutes into the round.	Bar
	Botanist	Easy to Medium	Completely ignore the chef's requests; start a grow-op. Click your best plant yourself with a chainsaw. Petition the Captain to legalize marijuana. Get denied and make magic mushrooms instead.	Hydroponics, Maintenance
	Janitor	Easy to Medium	Clean already clean floors; whine about beatings. Stuff everything into your trash cart. Clean up crime scenes before Security has a chance to investigate.	Janitor's Closet, Medbay, Morgue, Maintenance
	Mail Courier (Head of Delivering, Mail Bringer)	Easy	Secure peace between dogs and mail carriers by delivering mail to a pugperson. Get stuck in a mail pipe while trying to return to your office.	Cargo Bay, Bridge, Medbay, Research Sector, Tech Storage, Where mail can be delivered!
	Rancher	Easy to Medium	Yell "yeehaw!" and slide over railings in style. Make too many chickens and proceed to die to said chickens. Start a small army of raptors to attack those who cross you on the dusty trail.	Ranch, Hydroponics, Maintenance
	Clown	H O N K	Trip on your own shoes; regret your existence immediately. Save the station when nobody expects it; get beaten for your efforts. Bully cluwnes to compensate for your terrible job. Consider going back to law school.	Maintenance

Supply and Maintenance

Icon	Job Title	Difficulty	Info	Access
	Miner	Medium	Become a blind Swedish Elvis after a mishap with radioactive ore. Lose your butt in an explosion; use it to make a custom pick. Run out of air.	Mining Department, Mining Outpost, Maintenance
	Quartermaster	Medium	Buy bees and booze. Blow the budget on exotic trinkets. Point and stare at the tourists in the Cargo Bay. Declare independence from the rest of the station.	Cargo Bay, Maintenance
	Engineer	Easy to Medium	Harness the power of a fire hotter than the sun, a black hole, earthquakes, giant rods in acid, or the atom to keep the lights on. Rebuild Medbay into a combination hospital/clubhouse/hotel/museum/chair storage facility after it blows up. Misplace your insulated gloves and find your spare pairs mysteriously missing.	Engineering, Maintenance, Mechanics Workshop, Tech Storage
	Technical Trainee	Easy	Steal insulated gloves from Engineering. Use MechComp to build the world's most complicated cigarette lighter.	Engineering, Maintenance, Mechanics Workshop, Tech Storage

Medical

Icon	Job Title	Difficulty	Info	Access
	Medical Doctor	Medium	Practice brain surgery on yourself. Harvest monkey organs for cash. Join the round 30 minutes late just to find out you're the only doctor. Discover that Medbay has been looted and bombed. Perform a heart transplant while drunk and high. Focus all medical efforts on the Bar.	Medbay, Morgue, Pathology, Maintenance
	Medical Trainee	Easy	Take the spare Defibrillator from Medbay; disarm everyone. Empty a NanoMed Plus; use the medical supplies to make a modern art installation.	Medbay, Morgue, Pathology, Maintenance
	Geneticist	Easy to Medium	Make volunteers Skeleton Swedish Elvis. Fight a losing battle against sentient lab monkeys. Ignore animal experimentation laws. Fail to create a bee-human hybrid. Commit crimes against humanity. Become god, then lose the ability to speak.	Medbay, Morgue, Pathology, Genetics, Maintenance
	Roboticist	Medium	Steal all the butts for buttbots. Demand skulls for the skull throne. Give a botanist chainsaw arms. Get murdered by the Cyborgs you built. Build yourself a friend; leave them on the station when the escape shuttle arrives. Annoy the medical director to let you build a second AI.	Medbay, Morgue, Pathology, Robotics, Maintenance

Research

Icon	Job Title	Difficulty	Info	Access
	Scientist	Medium to Hard	Ignore the Artifact Lab. Steal the AI using Telescience. Heat the burn mix canister; burn to death in a massive fire. Test dangerous concoctions on monkeys. Gain the undying loyalty of staff assistants with triple meth. Attract the love and hate of everyone. Attempt to combine every drug into one pill.	Artifact Lab, Chemistry, Toxins Research, Toxins Storage, Research Sector, Teleporter Lab
	Research Trainee	Easy	Ask The Boss for maintenance access. Discover alien Mozart while performing Artifact Research. Synthesize nerve agents and drugs without a gas mask. Huff hot plasma gas. Discover a new and horrifying way to die during a Telescience expedition.	Artifact Lab, Chemistry, Toxins Research, Toxins Storage, Research Sector, Teleporter Lab

Security / Command

Mugshot	Job Title	Description	Difficulty	Access
	Captain	Shoot your cat. Reprogram the AI and become Double Captain. Confiscate all drugs, alcohol, and cash. Hand off your job to the clown as soon as trouble arrives. Promote Beepsky to Head of Security. Embezzle all of the payroll money. Make bee-harming illegal.	Medium to Hard	Everything (minus Head of Security's Office, Armory)
	Head of Personnel	Hand off your responsibilities to anyone willing. Steal the captain's energy gun. Disappear immediately and forever.	Medium to Hard	Make your own Captain-level ID
	Chief Engineer	Put the safety of the station in jeopardy in the name of profit. Suffocate in areas you're too lazy to repair.	Medium	Engineering, Mechanics Workshop, Cargo Bay, Mining Department, Mining Outpost, Teleporter, Bridge, EVA, Maintenance
	Medical Director	Get less respect than a cardboard box. Anesthetize patients with your gun. Sell all your blood. Assign all your doctors to the gym.	Medium	Medbay, Genetics, Robotics, Morgue, Pathology, Teleporter, Bridge, EVA, Maintenance
	Research Director	Sell "medicinal" drugs for cash. Accidentally delete the network. Explode into spiders.	Medium to Hard	Research, Artifacts, Toxins Research, Toxins Storage, Chemistry, Telescience, Teleporter, Bridge, EVA, Maintenance
	Head of Security	Get rehired; remind everyone why you were fired in the first place. Stomp your hat. Put an end to any and all fun.	Nightmarish	All-access except most Command offices, Artifact Lab, Electrical Equipment (APCs), Engineering Gas Storage/Atmospherics, Robot Depot, and QM Console
	Nanotrasen Security Consultant	Extra condition: A Head of Security exists. Arrive to bring order to chaos. Discover you do not have enough order for all the chaos. Call the escape shuttle instead.	Medium to Hard	Bridge, Security, Security Equipment, Brig, Medbay, Morgue, Research Corridors, Chemistry, EVA, Maintenance, Hydroponics, Cargo Bay, Firearms Carry Permit, Handling of Contraband Permit, Ticketing
	Security Officer	Do your job correctly and earn universal hatred. Die naked in Maintenance. Gain the respect of a mall cop.	Hard	Security, Security Equipment, Brig, Firearms Carry Permit, Handling of Contraband Permit, Ticketing, Medical (not Medical Equipment), Morgue, Research Sector, Chemical Lab (not Toxins), Engineering, Engine Control Room, Mining Department, Cargo Bay (not QM), Kitchen, Bar, Hydroponics, Maintenance
	Detective	Lose your gear. Drink too much. Monologue about farts. Force civilians to follow you.	Easy to Hard	Detective's Office, Brig, Medbay, Morgue, Research Corridors, Maintenance, Firearms Carry Permit, Handling of Contraband Permit, Ticketing
	Security Assistant	Ticket everything that moves and some things that don't. Lose donuts to the Clown.	Medium	Security, Brig, Maintenance, Firearms Carry Permit, Handling of Contraband Permit, Ticketing